“Each family finds within itself a summons that cannot be
ignored, and that specifies both its dignity and its responsibility: family,
become what you are” (Familiaris Consortio [FC], 17).
What are we?
St. John Paul II continues, “The
family, which is founded and given life by love, is a community of persons: of
husband and wife, of parents and children, of relatives” (FC, 18). Most fundamentally, we are a communion of persons created
in the image and likeness of the Blessed Trinity.
My
family recently attended a day for families at the Saint John Paul II National Shrine. It was an entire afternoon of talks for parents, catechetical sessions
for children of all ages, adoration and benediction, Mass with Cardinal Wuerl,
and a dinner reception that included a beautiful harp performance and a raffle
for the largest balloon lions I’d ever seen. Someone commented that the Mass
had been quite lively, considering the large number of families with young
children. My husband smiled and whispered to me, “Haven’t these people ever
been to a Spanish Mass?”
We had to split up and attend different events. While my
husband went to the presentation for parents, I stayed with our children for
the catechesis offered by the Sister Servants of the Lord. After plenty of
games and fun, the sisters sat the children down for a short catechesis about
the Blessed Trinity and the Holy Family. They began with a lesson about
the Blessed Trinity, using the catchy tune of Frère Jacques. “God the Father,
God the Father, God the Son, God the Son. God the Holy Spirit, God the Holy
Spirit, Three in One!” Who is God? He is love. He loves so much that His love
is shared within the three Divine Persons of the Blessed Trinity—Father, Son,
and Holy Spirit. His love is so immense that it pours forth and creates life. All
life is a gift, and all creatures reflect the grandeur of God. Of the many noble
creatures God made, He crowned man and woman with glory and honor (Psalm 8:5).
Yet we receive more than glory and honor. “For God so
loved the world that he gave us His only Son, that all who believe in him
should not perish by have eternal life” (John 3:16). That is why Christmas is so glorious—it is a celebration
of the birth of the Son of God into a human family at a specific time in
history. The beautiful image of the Holy Family reminds us that family life is
at the heart of God’s plan to share his love with us. Jesus, Mary, and Joseph
show us what Christian families are: the home of Christ, where love is made
flesh and dwells among us.
But if your family is anything like mine, we fall short
of being a dwelling-place of Christ. We make plenty of mistakes every day. What
makes it possible for us to get back on track? God’s mercy and grace, although it
is always available, requires us to discipline our minds and hearts so that we
can receive it with greater freedom. Something that has helped me in this is to
examine my conscience every day. I like to follow the Examen, a prayer given to us by St. Ignatius of Loyola. It is described
by Fr. Michael Gaitley as “the most effective tool for being formed into a
contemplative-in-action, that is, a person who can easily find God in all
things, even amid the hustle and bustle of the world” (Consoling the Heart of Jesus, 178). This prayer is a great nightly routine
for individuals or married couples to practice together. It also helps prepare
us to go to Confession to receive the sacramental graces of God’s mercy and
healing. Fr. Gaitley uses the acronym “BAKER” to describe the elements of the Examen:
Blessings.
This is the first and most important element of the Examen, because we review
our day so as to praise and thank God for His many blessings. While we do not
go over each blessing individually, we focus on specific moments of joy, which
St. Ignatius calls “consolations.”
Ask. We ask
the Holy Spirit to enlighten our minds and hearts so we can recognize our sins
of the day.
Kill. We look
at our sins, weaknesses, and attachments closely at this time, what St.
Ignatius calls “desolations.” Fr. Gaitley describes these desolations as
moments when our “hearts dropped.” Instead of letting those desolations bring us
down, we take them to Jesus in the next step.
Embrace. This
is the moment when we let Jesus embrace us with his mercy and love. Fr. Gaitley
recommends thinking of the image of Divine Mercy, and staying on this part of
the Examen slightly longer.
Resolution. Here we use the reflections during
the earlier part of our Examen to make resolutions for tomorrow.
