All I Want for Christmas

Have you ever thought about the many couples desiring the gift of a child this Christmas?   Some couples have suffered miscarriages or stillbirths and long to have a healthy pregnancy, labor, and delivery.  Others have been able to conceive one or two children, and even though they would like a larger family, have been unable to conceive again.  Still others have never been able to conceive at all.  It is estimated that one in six couples suffers with some form of infertility, although one study from the World Health Organization suggests the numbers are even higher (see the WHO article here).

            The desire to have a child is natural and beautiful.  Sometimes, however, our desires can become disordered.  For example, if I have abstained from dairy products while nursing a lactose-intolerant infant for over a year, my desire for an ice-cream sundae may increase to the point that I want to eat ice cream all day, every day.  It seems that many couples have been experiencing infertility as a “forced diet,” and after a certain period of time, patience is lacking and the longing for children has increased exponentially.  

            The question then becomes, what is the greatest gift an infertile couple can receive when they have reached this point?

            From the secular humanist’s perspective, perhaps the best gift is a huge sum of money to invest in Artificial Reproductive Techniques (ART), or even an artificial womb (see "A Brave New World of Human Reproduction" here).  The problem is that even if a child is conceived and born successfully, he or she has been treated as an object instead of a person (either to be implanted in a womb, frozen with many other embryos, or possibly kept alive for the legal time limit in an artificial womb).  Moreover, while scientists using ART can, in some instances, "create" new human life, they have not actually identified and cured the root cause of the infertility.  Finally, what are the long-term emotional, spiritual, and psychological effects of ART on the minds and souls of the child, his or her parents, and on the scientists who carry out this research for months or years at a time?  ART is imperfect, and in my opinion, creates more problems than answers.

            From a Christian’s perspective, and from personal experience with infertility in two chapters of my marriage, I would propose that the best gift is hope.  Hope comes in many shapes and sizes.  For some, it is shared by discussing the availability of ethical means of treating infertility (see One More Soul’s list of doctors available nationwide on their website)  For others, healing ministries play a crucial role; Christian counseling, spiritual direction, or events such as special Masses for infertile couples (or those who have lost a child before or during birth).  Hope can be experienced through support groups and conferences, reading good books (The Infertility Companion for Catholics comes to mind), etc.  In the end, hope is limitless because its source is Infinite.  “For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope” (Jer. 29:11). 

The Three Gifts of Christmas

St. John Paul II’s first Urbi et Orbi message proclaims the beauty of Christmas as a “feast of man.”  Our human nature has been “taken into the unity of the Divine Person of the Son, into the unity of the Word in whom God eternally expresses himself.” (See Urbi et Orbi Message of His Holiness John Paul II, Christmas 1978. Available here)  This understanding of human nature is unheard of in the history of humanity, and completely unique to Christianity.  Furthermore, a great power is unleashed at Christmas.  We are given the gift of becoming children of God.  The Holy Father’s message is very clear on this point: “The Birth of the Incarnate Word is the beginning of a new power for humanity itself, the power open to every man, in accordance with the words of St. John ‘he gave power to become children of God’ (Jn 1: 12).” (See Urbi et Orbi, number 2)  This is astounding, when we stop and think about it for a moment.  God is offering us three priceless gifts this Christmas: his own Son, the elevation of our human nature into his divine life, and the power to become his beloved children. 

It seems that we have quite a lot to be grateful for this Christmas!

We hope this blog will instigate a lively discussion from a theological perspective; faith seeking understanding about life and love.  When possible, we will incorporate current events and popular culture.  We hope the topics will be relevant and practical, while at the same time inspiring and fresh.